We explore how reframing sacrifice as compromise can profoundly alter our relationships and personal growth. The discussion also delves into the importance of language, the influence of our surroundings, and the difference between mere tradition and a genuine relationship with faith.
• The difference between compromise and sacrifice
• Power of language in shaping our mindset
• Importance of surrounding oneself with positive influences
• Evaluation of tradition versus relationship in faith
• Personal experiences with hypocrisy in religious communities
• Encouragement to conduct personal inventory of thoughts and actions
Transcript:
Speaker 1:
If you’ve ever struggled with fear, doubt or worry and wondering what your true purpose was all about, then this podcast is for you. In this show, your host, sylvia Worsham, will interview elite experts and ordinary people that have created extraordinary lives. So here’s your host, sylvia Worsham.
Speaker 2:
Good morning Lightbringers. It’s Sylvia Worsham. Welcome to Release that Reveal Purpose In this episode we are going to be talking about. Is it tradition or is it relationship? Is it compromise or is it sacrifice? The purpose of this call is to really dive deeper into the choices we make, the conscious choices we make, that either keep us stuck in our current circumstances or moves us forward, propels us forward in our growth journey.
Speaker 2:
I have found that when I’ve shifted the way I talk to myself, the way I think about myself, the way I think about others, think about other relationships, it starts to change everything around me. Perspective. For the longest time I used to always say that when I moved to Austin and gave up my life in Pfizer and my position, because when I transferred here Pfizer wouldn’t give me a transfer, so I had to start looking for a brand new job. And with that job came the trade-off of going from like a six-figure salary to a five-figure salary and starting all over again. And I used to always say that was my sacrifice. And about two months ago I encountered another wife, professional woman, entrepreneur like me who had done the same thing. Her husband lived in France. She moved from the United States Big old move and she said, sylvia, not sacrifice, compromise. And it it started a a process in me of shifting or re shifting, because I had already learned how to do this.
Speaker 2:
I forgotten. You know, you get out of the habit of doing something that’s actually very good for you and unfortunately, your mind is very powerful and very knowledgeable and very used to its programming and its programmer, which is you, and it goes back very easily into old patterns of being and behaving. So it was really easy for me to fall back into those patterns. It’s an ego trap, if you will, and it’s something I talk extensively about in my latest book, in Faith I Thrive. So if you haven’t had a chance to get a copy, I suggest you do. You’ll learn a lot about the two minds and how you can start using the conscious ability of your mind, which is where your thoughts and your choices and your attitudes reside, to start making better choices for yourself in this moment, right now. This is the beauty of life.
Speaker 2:
Coaching right Is that we work with the present moment. Our therapists do a very good job of helping us with our past moment. Our therapists do a very good job of helping us with our past, so need help consider both and you will start propelling forward in your relationships and within yourself. But going back to what I was talking about, the way she said it was like Sylvia was compromised and I started to reframe that in my mind Because, you see, in marriage we have been conditioned as women to kind of view our spouses as competition, and it’s just, societally, is how we grew up right, and it plays a huge role even in the corporate environment to kind of pin us up, pit us up one against the other subconsciously you know, and and we pick up on it because we’re very smart people and we begin to look at the opposite sex as the enemy.
Speaker 2:
They’re not. The word compromise is more in alignment with partnership with your spouse than the word sacrifice. The word sacrifice means that you gave up something, and then there’s this expectation that gets automatically designed in your mind towards your spouse. So it’s like, hey, I gave this up for you, what are you going to give up for me? And it starts that pattern of behaving towards one another that’s not in partnership, in union as one, as God intended. So that’s my one example is to start shifting the way you see the circumstances you’re currently in, the way you see your past influencing and informing you today. How do you start shifting that?
Speaker 2:
I’m going to give you one tip for this piece of the podcast. Start using a pencil when you write things down and observe how you’re speaking and how you’re thinking for an entire day. Get very quiet, try not to speak as much, listen to your inner voice and listen to how you’re processing information and try to filter out those words that can’t come to your mind like being negative and write them down. Being negative and write them down. Take an inventory of those thoughts. That’s one. That’s one tip. The other tip is to start when you write things down and you catch yourself using the negative meaning. I don’t want to do this. I always never. You know all those words that are very negative and very narrow minded ways of saying things. I would change them around in my mind, I would rewrite them. So, for example, I don’t want to go work out today, reframe it to I’m choosing to relax today. See the difference You’re choosing something that’s giving you some joy and love versus I don’t want to do this. The reason why you want to shift it to the affirmative is because your mind is always listening, and when I say your mind is always listening in this podcast, realize I’m talking about your subconscious mind. It is the most powerful of the two minds, so you want to give it the best programming available out there.
Speaker 2:
What do I mean by that? Be careful who you hang out with. What influence do these people have over your life? How do they speak into you? Are they bringing you light or taking your light away? That’s inventory. The other thing is what are you doing with your time and energy? Are you going directly?
Speaker 2:
Every morning, you wake up and you start bombarding your mind with negative articles, like from social media, or get really enthralled into that. Be careful with that. Be aware I don’t want to say be careful, be aware of how you’re using your time and energy. So take an inventory of all that as well. What are the habits you’re currently doing? So another thing to consider as you’re writing these things down is to put three columns stop, start and continue. That was a tactic we use a lot in pharmaceuticals and when we were dealing with things we wanted to change up in the district and it was very useful to me then. So I’m using it now in my coaching practice when I guide others.
Speaker 2:
It’s take a look at the habits that you want to stop because they’re just not good for you, like scrolling through social media for three hours every day, or looking at negative articles, or choosing to watch movies that are full of violence and aggressiveness and anger. All of that is influencing your mind, because your mind has zero filter. Let me say that again, it has no filter. So everything you are feeding it in terms of the exposure that your body goes through on a daily basis what you watch, what you hear, how you speak, how others speak into you, who’s around you, the foods you eat. All of that influences your mind, all of it. So be aware of that and be conscious of your choices, be purposeful in your approach, because your mind is always listening. And I’ve got to tell you, in recent days I have been observing not just my attitude, my daughter’s attitude, the friends around her, and I’ve noticed how some of her friends have been hanging out with different influences that are not necessarily the greatest for them, and you see a marked difference in their attitude, even towards my daughter, or towards friendships in general, or just the way they’re carrying themselves. It’s like they’re shifting, but not in a good way, and it matters. It matters what you read, what you, the music you listen to. All of it matters, guys. So be mindful and be conscious of the choices that you’re making today. So again, compromise versus sacrifice, and I said, tradition versus relationship, and let me explain what I mean by this.
Speaker 2:
A couple of days ago, I went out on a very refreshing walk with a very good friend of mine and we were talking about our faith and she was talking about how. I asked her how she viewed her faith and the answer was profound, for, in my case when she said, well, it’s tradition, I, she’s catholic. And she says you know, that’s traditionally. What my family has belonged to is the catholic church and it’s a big part of my culture. And but then I said, okay, that’s great. I mean, I understand that piece because I came from the catholic environment. I know how this is, know the tradition, like the rituals that they do, the beautiful ceremonies. But my question back to her was what about relationship with God? And you could tell that that was not something that she has currently in her life. She doesn’t have that relationship.
Speaker 2:
So I want you guys to think about how you are viewing your faith. Are you just kind of checking off the boxes and going to church because that’s what you’ve always done, that’s what your family has always done, but you want something more. Then start to move in the direction of more. Let me give you a couple of tips on how to start that journey, because I was once like you. How to start that journey? Because I was once like you, if this resonates with you I had turned away from God for 10 years because of the hypocrisy I experienced in the Catholic church.
Speaker 2:
I’d go to church and I would see all of these people, you know, oh, pray, and be so fervent and so good about the traditional parts of the ceremonies, and the minute they would step out of that church they became the ugliest people I’d ever met. One of them was someone I lived with, very hypocritical, and it just I made the mistake of associating the mistakes of human people with God. I actually blame God for the hypocrisy I experienced in the Catholic Church. The truth was, god had nothing to do with it. That’s not something that even Christ would have agreed to if he had been here on earth, as it was happening.
Speaker 2:
If you recall, he, if you recall jesus, is someone who had a very high standard of integrity. He had a very high standard because his standards were perfect. They’re much higher than the human standard. Right, he’s someone that preached and talked a lot about relationship with his father. In almost every parable story that he taught, he mentioned that relationship over and over and over again. And if you read scripture and you know the New Testament, especially the book of Matthew, you see how Jesus was really less about religion and more about relationship, less about tradition, more about relationship.
Speaker 2:
So let’s start to reframe how we view our faith and I think the third episode of this podcast last year was faith versus religion. There’s a huge difference, guys. If you see, in the current atmosphere, political atmosphere, I know a lot of Christians have been praying over President Trump and that has really turned a lot of people off because of Christians being depicted as these people that are just, you know, like obsessed, almost to the point of obsession, with the current president. Now I’ve struggled to call myself a Christian for that reason, because I don’t fall in that category with them. But I am a non-denominational Christian. Yet I’m more about upholding the standards of Christ, as he stated and stipulated in scripture and word, versus doing the things that are going to promote my agenda, whatever that is right. So I want to call into kind of light that not all Christians are the way that they’re being depicted on national television news right now.
Speaker 2:
I want you to understand that a lot of us don’t feel and don’t do things that God would condone. We just we don’t do what he would not allow Like we look at his expectations and we honor him daily and, yes, we slip up because we’re human. We are human beings. We’re not flawless like Christ, but we aim for that expectation that he has of us right, so not all of us. It would be unfair of me to group all Catholics. If a few Catholics did something bad, right and we can go back to like the whole you know priest scandal and I can say all Catholics are like that and they condone that, and would that be fair? No, that would not be fair.
Speaker 2:
The Catholics also did some good things and some good works, and so I want you guys to look at the full picture before you zone in or focus in on a couple of Christians that are like this. And it all goes down to your focus and your mindset and how you’re thinking of things and how you’re getting confirmation bias, like in the things that you’re watching on TV, because every time you click on something, your phone remembers it, as you guys know, and it’s going to bring you more articles on that. So just kind of take a big inventory of what you’re currently reading and see if you can find a common theme. Inventory of what you’re currently reading and see if you can find a common theme and if the theme is like in just one direction. I challenge you guys to have a big worldly view, to actually look at all sides before you actually come to a decision. Give your mind more information. Don’t just give it the same information over and over and over and over again. Be curious, stay open and stay humble. Guys, above all, realize that we’re all doing our best out here in this world and together, when we start working together in unity, we’re actually unstoppable.
Speaker 2:
I’m Sylvia Worsham. Thank you so much for tuning in to this episode of Compromise or Sacrifice, tradition or Relationship. Have a wonderful week, stay safe. Love y’all Bye now.
Speaker 1:
So that’s it for today’s episode of Release Doubt Reveal Purpose. Head on over to iTunes or wherever you listen and subscribe to the show. One lucky listener every single week who posts a review on iTunes We’ll win a chance in the grand prize drawing to win a $25,000 private VIP day with Sylvia Worsham herself. Be sure to head on over to ReleasedOutRevealPurposePodcastcom and pick up a free copy of Sylvia’s gift and join us on the next episode.