This episode explores the transformative power of healing as host Sylvia Worsham shares her personal journey through childhood trauma and its impact on her parenting. By discussing themes of bullying, forgiveness, and modeling grace, Sylvia emphasizes the importance of addressing past wounds to foster a loving and supportive environment for her children.
• Discussion of personal healing and therapy experiences
• The connection between past traumas and current parenting challenges
• Reflection on bullying experiences and their lasting impact
• Encouragement to embrace forgiveness as a gift to oneself
• Exploration of being a light bringer versus a light taker
• Importance of modeling grace and kindness for children
Transcript:
Speaker 1:
If you’ve ever struggled with fear, doubt or worry and wondering what your true purpose was all about, then this podcast is for you. In this show, your host, sylvia Worsham, will interview elite experts and ordinary people that have created extraordinary lives. So here’s your host, sylvia Worsham.
Speaker 2:
Hey, lightbringers, it’s Sylvia Worsham. Welcome to Released Out Revealed Purpose. In this episode we’re going to be talking about a topic that is very near and dear to my heart and something that I’m currently working through therapy with my therapist every Wednesday, and it’s chapter two of In Faith I Thrive. I talk a lot about being bullied in high school and she’s taking me back even before high school through EMDR and we are visiting some very painful chapters in my life. I’m starting to understand and reframe of the messages that I’ve believed for a very long time and it’s something that I wanted to do because I wanted to parent my kids with a healed version of myself and not project onto them these wounds that I’ve been carrying around for a long time.
Speaker 2:
And today’s verse on the Bible app when I opened it up, I thought it went hand in hand with what I wanted to discuss today, because it was a conversation I had with my daughter just this morning. I went up to a friend of hers or an acquaintance of hers and the first thing the little girl said was hi ugly. And my daughter was like I really just wanted to push her and I had these visions of wanting to hurt her because my daughter right now is going through a rougher period as it comes to the social aspects and it has a lot to do with her anxiety and it’s something that she’s actively working on right. So we’re trying to help our daughter push past that fear that she’s feeling social anxiety that she’s starting to feel in fourth grade. She’s a kid that’s always hung out with boys that have been her friends and in fourth grade she lost two of her actually four of her buddies that transferred out of the school and she kind of fell out of sorts Right, and she’s never been the kid that’s hung around girls a lot. She had one, maybe two girlfriends, three girlfriends that she really likes, but beyond that it’s mostly been boys and I was bullied by girls a lot in high school. So when she told me this conversation she had had with this kid, I was really upset for her and as a mom I became very protective of her.
Speaker 2:
But what I want to let you guys know is that when we don’t heal our wounds, they inform the way we parent our kiddos and even though the wound was not your fault, it is your responsibility to heal it and that’s why I’m healing my wounds from my past so that I can parent my kiddos in the best light possible, from a different perspective, not from the fear-based perspective, but rather from the love perspective. And so I wanted to share the scripture that I read this morning on the Bible app. It’s something I do every day at 5 am with my coffee. I have coffee chats with God and now my dad, who’s in heaven. And the verse of the day came from 1 Peter 3, 9. And it says do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult. On the contrary, repay evil with a blessing, because to this you were called, so that you may inherit the blessing. And what I took from that was you know Jesus, he modeled this for us when he was here on earth, especially on the day that he was crucified.
Speaker 2:
Peter, who wrote that verse, actually denied him three times. Jesus denied that he knew Jesus so he wouldn’t get caught and crucified, or with him, and betrayed Jesus three times that day. And Jesus modeled forgiveness and, if you recall, in scripture he says Father, please forgive them, for they know not what they do. And so this is the example that I shared with my little girl this morning. She told me this. I said do you know what you should tell your friends is when she tells you that you’re ugly, just say, oh, and I think you’re beautiful. Because here’s what it is, guys. We’re there to represent him on earth. We want to bless people so much that they see Christ through us. Now it’s very hard to do because I’ve been on the receiving end. I’ve had bullying even into my time now.
Speaker 2:
I’ve experienced it even as late as the summer. I remember one conversation I had with a good girlfriend of mine, a pickleball player, and she texted me. It was a tooth there, I remember, and my dad had just died. I was out walking the dog and she said, hey, are you at Williamson County playing pickleball with so-and-so? And I said no. And she said, oh, I thought you were part of that group.
Speaker 2:
And when she mentioned the person’s name, I knew right away that I was going to be excluded, because I had been excluded by this individual a lot. And I said, well, I can already tell you that I’m going to be excluded. I’m going to be one of the people that she’s going to tell you not to include. And sure enough, it happened. It takes a lot of effort for me to then say I don’t want to be that person, that revengeful, full of hate kind of person, because that person does not reflect God, the Christ. I want to reflect Christ in everything that I do, even when it’s hard, because Jesus modeled that for us right. He went first, he modeled forgiveness, he modeled turning the other cheek and in the devotional that I sent to a couple of people in the morning and he in the devotional that I sent to a couple of people in the morning really early, so I email.
Speaker 2:
If you don’t text them, that would be cool. It talks a lot about how in the old testament and the law of moses it was an eye for an eye, but when jesus came he kind of flipped the verse on its head and really modeled something totally different, more for if somebody slaps you on one cheek, then turn the other cheek. That comes from the sermon of the mount, that’s in matthew in the new testament, and you see his example day in and day out, how he carried himself here on earth when he was on mission and even as he’s being crucified he’s turning the other cheek and he’s asking his father to forgive those who do not know what they do. And I asked my daughter. I said you know you’ve been baptized as a Christian and with that comes a responsibility to honor and obey him. And this is one of his commandments it’s love me and love others. It’s hard to love the people that hurt us. It’s very hard, trust me.
Speaker 2:
I know I’m currently in the process of putting to bed all those feelings that have been swirling around in my heart and my head for many years I mean, I’m 50 now. In my heart and my head for many years. I mean, I’m 50 now, so this all happened for many years in high school, for four consecutive years and I the greatest betrayal for me was from a very good friend of mine who had been my very good friend when we were in middle school, but as soon as she went into high school she turned on me. It was the biggest betrayal ever and I think it’s the reason why I turned away from God for so many years being a Catholic, because I was in a Catholic high school and the bullying was so. It was so horrific, it was mental, it was emotional. They tried to get physical with me. Luckily I ran away from them. But my, that best friend of mine that turned on me, she was one of the four bullies that cornered me and wanted to pour ice, cold water over my head after a pee after physical education. And luckily in those years I was very fit. I was a cross country runner, I was a tennis player and I ran away from them. I was a junior. I remember I wasn’t even a senior yet and I had had it with their bullying ways. It had been going on for too many years and I finally went to the administration and told them and of course I was then known as the snitch right Like how could I do that? But what people didn’t realize was just how bad it had gotten. They didn’t know that every class there was a comment there. You know his there ganging up there.
Speaker 2:
They don’t realize all that adds up and after a while kids feel so hurt and it’s an important topic for me because I see so many kids that take their own life. Just recently I heard of a young girl. I’d never met her, my heart broke. She committed suicide.
Speaker 2:
Suicide and how dark do you have to feel inside, how devastated must it, must they have felt, for them to take their own life. I was lucky in that I had a mom who was very engaged with me, very aligned, and was always giving me good advice and and I’m grateful for my mom, that’s why I’ve always said my mom’s my best friend. But when my daughter came to me I said you know, we are light bringers and when that comes up, an enormous responsibility to promote light, messages of light. Let’s forgive people, let’s show them what forgiveness looks like so that they may be inspired, they may turn more towards God, because if they see God through us, they’ll be intrigued, especially people that don’t believe in him. So I want for people to understand.
Speaker 2:
I want you to reflect on how do you show up for people in your life? Are you a light bringer or a light taker? Do you take away their light? Do you constantly take up their time and energy and never give them any space or attention? If you’re one of those people that does that, I am going to challenge you to start making some changes in your life. Change some of these habits and really be there for people. Be there for your family members, be there for your enemies, be there for the people that have hurt you. Be ready to serve. There was a part in the devotional that I wanted to reference here, because I think it’s really important that we talk about it, and it was something that when I read it, I was like this definitely is what I want to tell my kids to do here. It is Love others even if they hate you. Serve others even if they mistreat you.
Speaker 2:
Pray for others, even if they persecute you. So I want you to think about and reflect on the people who have hurt you in your past. Can you find it in your heart to forgive them, Because you see the forgiveness piece, that’s a gift you’re giving yourself.
Speaker 2:
You’re not giving it for them. You’re doing it for yourself and for Christ, because you want to honor God with your actions every single day. Still serve others. Like you know, just recently I served we went out all out to lunch and this lady that she and I have had an interesting history I actually served her plate for her and the times we’ve gotten together I’ve laughed so hard. I would hope that she would realize that there is a chance here to start turning things around between us, that there’s no reason for us to be at odds with each other, that we have more in common than we don’t, that maybe, perhaps God has put us in each other’s path for a reason, and if that reason is for us to have more humility and to understand humility more, then yeah, I’m all for it and I’ll gladly be in her presence if I’m going to shine God’s light and help her and help myself and represent God in a very, very bright and beautiful and loving light.
Speaker 2:
I’m Sylvia Worsham. Thank you so much for tuning in to this episode on friendship and service to those who mistreat you. Have a wonderful week, stay safe. Love you all. Bye now.
Speaker 1:
So that’s it for today’s episode of Release Doubt Reveal Purpose. Head on over to iTunes or wherever you listen and subscribe to the show. One lucky listener every single week who posts a review on iTunes will win a chance in the grand prize drawing to win a $25,000 private VIP day with Sylvia Worsham herself. Be sure to head on over to ReleasedOutRevealPurposePodcastcom and pick up a free copy of Sylvia’s gift and join us on the next episode.